The Science of Happy Holidays

Join our Hump Day Conversation #2: The Science of Happy Holidays! How are we all dealing with the expectations and stress during the holidays, especially during 2020?

Introduction to Hump Day Talks00:15-00:52
Introduction to Science of Happy Holidays00:53-01:53
Dr Ben’s Takeaways from Tony Robbins01:54-02:40
Priming Yourself02:41-02:56
Sharing Circle02:57-04:59
Have to Do It VS Get to Do It05:00-07:24
Quality Quantifier07:25-10:59
What We Can Control11:00-11:24
Goal of Hump Day Conversations11:25-11:42
Closing Thoughts11:43-13:51

Dr Clayton Roach: [00:00:03] Guys, welcome to our second, we’ll get started. Nine o’clock, we’re going to be pretty, pretty good on time here. We’re going to start at nine o’clock every night, every Wednesday night. So then I started this idea actually last Wednesday and then two hours before we did last week’s one. And I think it was the idea was to basically connect with our our group of patients, because obviously this whole new world has gotten us a little disconnected and we wanted to connect. Right. Because in a world where everything is contracting, I think we can provide a little bit of an opportunity for people to expand a little bit and not contract all the time. So this is our second, second night. And what we thought would be great to talk about is the holidays coming up. And both Ben and I listen to a podcast from Tony Robbins and his wife, Sage, and they were talking about the expectations that are on our shoulders when it comes to the holidays and the stress. And I mean, it’s pretty palpable right now with our patients. That stress is at an all time high, not just because of the season, but because what everybody is experiencing right now in the outside world and we don’t need to talk about what’s going on. But, you know, we all know what’s out there and it can be pretty overwhelming at times. And I’m telling you, the spines of my patients are taking a beating right now in places that have been doing well. Some of them are going through relapses right now and wondering why. And it is what it is. So then why do you start off sharing with me or sort of sharing with our audience what you shared with me from what your takeaway was from that podcast? We both listened to.

Dr Ben Boudreau: [00:01:52] Yeah, you know, one of the one of the big takeaways for me is, you know, you want to be able to define the blessing every day and then be the blessing and it starts from within. You know, we have so many rules that we go through and rules that are placed upon us when we go into the holidays. And so, you know, it’s good to let go of some of those rules and be a little more open and accepting of where other people might be. You know, we’re going into a holiday season, like Dr. Roach said, where, you know, stress is at an all time high and uncertainty is at an all time high. Am I going to get to see my friends and family this year? You know, can I travel? You know, am I going to have to see my grandchildren over zoom? Right. You know, there’s things like that. And so basically, one of the big takeaways and one of the ways to sort of overcome some of the stress is to do what Sage and Tony talk about is the sharing circle. And this is a huge take away. So one of the first things that you’re going to do is start by priming your mind with appreciation and thanks. You can do this by doing something very simple. Take a piece of paper, write down the things that you’re thankful for this year, OK? They can be stories, you know, things that over the years that you’ve accumulated, I remember that story that was amazing. Or maybe it can be something as little as you discovered a new recipe this year.

Dr Ben Boudreau: [00:03:23] Right. Or, you know, maybe you started exercise. I mean, you lost weight. And that was a goal that you wanted to reach, whatever it may be, take a piece of paper, write it down. No, to second thing, when it comes to the holiday holidays with friends, now you’ve primed your mind, right? So then you can be the light for other people. You’ve found the light. Now you can be the light. So you can ask people, you can share. OK, this is what I was thankful for this year. And then it opens up the door so that friends can be then thankful with you and they can share their appreciation and love at the same time. Third thing, because you’ve done this, you prime the environment with love and you can ensure that everyone is heard and that you’re not only bringing physical presence this year, but you’re also bringing a presence filled with love, appreciation and kindness. That’s really good then, right? And then just just the last point here. So now you’ve found the blessing, be the blessing for others. And what this will do is make this the best holiday season yet. And you can do this whether or not you’re with people in person or if you’re seeing your friends and family over zoomIn face time, practice, sharing, practice, being open and honest and practice priming your love and appreciation for others. That’s my point. My big takeaway from from the podcast this weekend

Dr Clayton Roach: [00:04:59] That was really good. One of the things that they shared was, you know, many of us right now are in a state where we constantly think about the things that we’re no longer able to do, the things we’re no longer able to do, all the things that are being taken away from us. And, you know, the reverse side of that is, you know, instead of thinking about, you know, that you have to do a zoo meeting is that you get to do a zoo meeting. Right. It’s just technology wasn’t available way back, you know, 20 years ago. So just changing that, that kind of struck me because, you know, we all get caught up in that conversation where we’re talking about the things that we we we are we have to do this. Well, you get to do it and you realize there’s some people that don’t have the privilege of exercising. You get to do it. Or, you know, there’s people that don’t have the luxury. You know, they don’t have grandkids and they’re alone. When you have grandkids, you just might have to see them on Zoom. So, you know, just the changing from you have to do it that to the point where you get to do it. I think that was a good a good chef. Now, this is a true story. So on Fridays, we typically have and this you know, we sell nutrition in our practice, but on Fridays sometimes we’ll have a pizza day with our kids and we’ll go around the circle and say, what was one good thing that happened to you this week? And sometimes I think, you know, my kids are listening, right? And they’re like and they just want to eat their pizza.

Dr Clayton Roach: [00:06:20] And sometimes the kids are like, well, what’s a good one? Good thing that happened to you this week? And my daughter will say recess. Right. So I was like, well, whatever. Right. But it occurred to us one day we didn’t we didn’t do that. And my five year old daughter Devah said, Dad, how was your week this week? Right. Stole whatever, whatever. You know, whatever you think about that, it’s not about how we do it. And it’s about the patterning that they, you know, have that habit of doing that and, you know, sharing that and having that sharing. So Christmas is a great time to do that. And I think if you do that and you kind of lead and be the example, you said be right. I think the people around you will kind of follow on that mood because we all know, like, you know, sometimes you get people that are negative in a room and all of a sudden the whole room smells negative. Right. So it’s very easy to to get caught up in that. So we call this Humpday conversation the science of Happy Holidays. So Tony and Sage shared this what’s called the quality quantifier. So we got like three or four months when I go a little over. But it’s called a quality quantifier. So what that means you’re going to put a numerical value on the quality of what you’re about to experience instead of afterwards saying I should have done this.

Dr Clayton Roach: [00:07:45] I wasn’t happy with that in all that means is that going into the holidays, you are going to create your intention before they even happen. So many of you need to be honest with yourself right now and say leading up to the holidays right now, how do I feel about the holidays on a scale of one to ten? Where are you? And there’s probably some of you that are at a two or three. Some of you may be out of eight. So here’s the goal, and this is what we need to take home tonight. So where are you on a scale of one to ten if you’re a to market down now, what you need to do is say what would bring it up to a four or what would bring it up two or three while you know what if I got to. If I got to go walk in the woods and have like an hour with myself during the holidays once a day. That would make it a four. OK, great. So what would make it a five? Well, what would make it a five is if we actually got time to sit down as a family because we never have time to do that. We’re busy. And if we got time to sit down as a family for supper, five out of the seven days that would put me at a six, what would put me at eight? And you continue to go until you get to nine or 10. And what that does is that you now have a recipe for the holidays on how you going to create a ten out of ten experience.

Dr Clayton Roach: [00:09:13] Now, guys, things will happen. Right. The sister that always gets drunk at Christmas may do that or you’re belligerent. Uncle might say things that you might not be fond of or whatever. You cannot control everything that’s going to happen. But what you can’t control is how you show up with that intention. And that’s one thing that totally got me on that podcast, is that there is a scientific way to basically bring that intention to the holidays with the people that are around you so that you create what you want instead of afterwards saying that, you know, we should have done this and we should have done that. And now it’s time to go to work again. And we all know that once that happens, then you’re back into your regular monotonous routine of going to work and doing the things that that you do. Right. So I don’t feel like that then. But that for me was, you know, I love to be able to having a system. And we’re actually going to sit down as a family this weekend with the kids and we’re going to mark down what would make it a 10 out of 10 for the holidays on our five days off so that we were able to create ahead of time what we want for the holidays. Right. So what the heck with the restrictions and everything that’s happening? Most of that is out of our control. So within that environment, within those restrictions, how do we make it a 10?

Dr Ben Boudreau: [00:10:33] Absolutely, absolutely. And that’s the second for me would have been the second biggest take away from it and and they explain it perfect that we can’t control the actions of other people, you know? I can’t as much as we try to control or, you know, try to avoid a belligerent family member or whatever it might be, you know, discussing covid, et cetera. You know, the things that we can control are inside of ourselves. We project our thoughts. We prime it. We create the environment that we want. So if you prime yourself for love and appreciation and goal setting in, what will make this a better holiday? It will be the best holiday yet. I agree, I agree.

Dr Clayton Roach: [00:11:22] So, guys, I hope you hope you enjoy this. So this was actually a request that there’s some people that commented that they want to talk about the stress in the holidays. And it just happened that I was listening to a podcast I’ve been listening to this podcast is really prevalent what we’re going to talk about. So the whole goal with these Humpday conversation is that we speak about something that you guys want. So I know there’s a bunch of you live right now. And what I want to make sure is that you comment on what you want us to talk about. Write it in the comments sections. Kathy, I hear you. We’re going to talk about things that you can do outside the office to keep yourself healthy. We’re going to write down what you guys what you guys want to hear, and then we’re going to talk about it. And that’s going to be our schedule. So every week we’ll look at what you guys want and we’ll talk about that. And later on, just FYI, we’re going to turn this into a podcast. So that’s that’s what we’re going to do. We want to make sure that we connect people and give people a way to get answers about their health when at a time where it’s hard to get appointments to health care practitioners, we want to bring you guys together because we love you and appreciate you for your commitment to us. And we feel that is something that we can give back is our time and expertise and help answer questions. You may have closing thoughts, then,

Dr Ben Boudreau: [00:12:46] You know, find the light, be the light and prime yourselves for positive attitudes every single day. Get up and be thankful that you can do it and that you get to do it. Not that you have to do it right, but life is a blessing.

Dr Clayton Roach: [00:13:02] Thanks, guys. So the whole thing you guys need to do is share this, OK? We really appreciate. We want to grow with this Humpday conversation thing. So make sure you share this conversation with your on your news feed. So just hit share. We’re going to repost this webinar tomorrow morning on our Facebook page. You’ll always be able to find it. Facebook algorithm’s. You’ll see it in your news feed and it’s gone. But you can always go to Roache Chiropractic Center and just find it there. Make sure you’re following us if you’re live. Obviously, you already are, but you’ll get notification when we’re live every Wednesday night, 9:00 Humpday conversations. Great to have you everybody to join us. Thank you so much. Thank you, guys. Next Wednesday night at nine o’clock and take care.